Tolerance
by Shauna Gibby

Tolerance so often does lead to love. Most of our missionaries serving throughout the world would bear testimony to that, as would those who have returned.

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Thought:

We must recognize at the outset that there is a difference between tolerance and tolerate. Your gracious tolerance for an individual does not grant him or her license to do wrong, nor does your tolerance obligate you to tolerate his or her misdeed. . . . Together we may stand, intolerant of transgression but tolerant of neighbors with differences. . . . Our beloved brothers and sisters throughout the world are all children of God. (Russell M. Nelson, “‘Teach Us Tolerance and Love’,” Ensign, May 1994, 69)

Song:

“We Are Different” Children’s Songbook, p. 263. Scripture: Verily, verily, I say unto you, The servant is not greater than his lord; neither he that is sent greater than he that sent him. (John 13:16)

Object Lesson:

Materials needed: An apple, an orange, and a banana.

Proceedure: Ask which of the fruits you display is better than the others. Ask for personal favorites.

Explain that even though you might like one kind of fruit better than another, it does not take away from the value of the other fruits; and explain that not everyone will prefer the same kind of fruit over another.

Liken the fruit to people. People are just a little different from each other in personality and in physical stature, but that does not lessen their worth to their Father in Heaven. (Beth Lefgren and Jennifer Jackson, More Power Tools for Teaching, [Salt Lake City: Bookcraft, 1991], p. 36.)

Story:

As a young bride, newly arrived in Cambridge, Massachusetts, I experienced some cultural shock. In those days Boston billed itself as the hub of culture, which included the leading families of a society very unfamiliar to me. In our first Relief Society meeting in a little old house on Brattle Street in Cambridge, I listened as a strong, faithful, wise woman (a longtime resident) implored us:

“Now don’t you Utah girls come here and hold your noses for four years wishing you were back in the only true West, where things are done right. Absorb this wonderful culture! Learn New England cookery. Get to know your Yankee neighbors. That may take some patience, but it’s well worth it. Catholics are people. Take the subway over to the Esplanade and hear the Boston Symphony, free, this summer. Do it; then you, as well as your husbands, will have something to take home.”

I believed her. Her sound advice changed my responses, and changed my life. When our four years were over, my husband brought home a Ph.D., and I came back loving New England—its speech patterns, seafood, Catholics, and all. This kind sister taught me about differences and a most impressive lesson on tolerance, and I learned that tolerating differences can lead to love.

Tolerance so often does lead to love. Most of our missionaries serving throughout the world would bear testimony to that, as would those who have returned. Because my father served for three years in Samoa, I grew up loving the Samoan people, their customs, their food, and their language. My brother served in Alaska. Our son served in Germany. Our daughter served in Argentina. My husband and I served in New England. We’ve also spent much time in Israel and have had extended visits to Yugoslavia, Taiwan, and Hong Kong. So in three generations my family has had the blessing of going over much of the world delivering a message, but also bringing home a message of kinship and love for many peoples.

I can see in my mind’s eye dear Sini Salanoa, our Samoan friend, half a world away from his beloved islands for the first time, asking us in his broken English to “be his family” during his time in Boston in 1953. And beautiful, fourteen-year-old Julie Wang, whom we met in K’Liao, a tiny fishing village in Taiwan. In her quiet Chinese manner she described her first prayers, which began with sweet familiarity: “Hello, God. This is Julie Wang.” Or fine, spiritual Gunther Myer from Germany, who joined our family for scripture study on Sunday evenings for a whole year. These represent so many who have enriched our lives. There are no divisive differences between us. Our commitment to the gospel becomes the great common denominator. We know whose we are, all of us. (Ann N. Madsen, “Tolerance, the Beginning of Christlike Love,” Ensign, Oct 1983, 26)

Activity:

Arrange with one family member to dress up in all the extra clothing, jewelry, etc. that she can wear. Have her enter the room walking slowly back and forth twice, while the other family members are asked to observe everything she is wearing. This should be made as difficult as possible, by including a hat, coat, scarf, earrings, bracelet, handbag, and any other items that might be handy.

After she leaves the room each family member is asked to write down on paper a list of the girl’s complete wardrobe. Have the girl return and let everyone check their list.

Explain that while this is a fun game, we sometimes focus too much on what other people are wearing. We shouldn’t judge someone by how fashionable or expensive their clothing is. (adapted from Alma Heaton, The LDS Game Book, [Salt Lake City: Bookcraft, 1968], p. 128.)

Refreshment

Fudge Pudding Cake

They’ll think it’s magic! A fudgy chocolate pudding cake that “bakes” right in the microwave.

1 cup all-purpose flour

1/4 cup granulated sugar

2 tablespoons baking powder

1/4 teaspoon salt

1/2 cup milk

2 tablespoons vegetable oil

1 teaspoon vanilla

1 cup chopped nuts

1 cup packed brown sugar

1/4 cup baking cocoa

1 3/4 cups boiling water

Mix flour, granulated sugar, 2 tablespoons cocoa, the baking powder, and salt in 2-quart microwaveable casserole. Stir in milk, oil, and vanilla. Stir in nuts. Spread evenly in casserole. Mix brown sugar and 1/4 cup cocoa; sprinkle over batter. Pour boiling water over batter.

Microwave uncovered on medium (50%) 9 minutes; rotate casserole 1/2 turn. Microwave on high 5 to 6 minutes or until top is almost dry.

Serve warm with ice cream or whipped cream. Serves 9. (Betty Crocker Sunday Cookbook, [Minneapolis: Wiley Publishing and Salt Lake City: Deseret Book, 2007], p.153.)

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