Man Up!
by Dave Ramsey
Dear Dave,
I bring home $2,800 a month, and my husband stays home with our two daughters – one three, the other three months. He’s healthy and able, but he won’t work because he thinks he can’t make enough money to cover the cost of daycare. Our rent is $1,000 a month, and our other bills add up to about $2,000 a month. What do you think about this, and when is it okay to avoid daycare expenses by not working?
Daisy
Dear Daisy,
I’m an old-school guy, a crusty old dinosaur about some things. I grew up in a generation where a guy who did this kind of thing was called a wuss, or worse; not because he’s staying home with the kids, but because he’s staying at home while you guys can’t pay the bills!
I’m all about family togetherness, and with spending as much time with your children as possible, and I don’t have a problem with guys being stay-at-home dads as long as the family is in agreement and can afford to do that kind of thing. But if you’re just scraping by, or can’t meet your financial obligations, which seems to be true with you guys, that’s a different story.
This guy needs to get off his butt, fulfill his responsibilities as a man and a husband, and find a way to start taking care of his family!
– Dave
Photo by Martin Boulanger
Posted by Rachel
from Ohio
I stay at home with my kids and even though I am the mom I still find ways to help out with the expenses. My husband doesn't make enough to cover our monthly bill so I babysit in my home while I am home with my own kids. Maybe this could be something he could do to help and not have to put the kids in day care.
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Posted by Nohemi
from Arizona
I think that a man's responsibility is to provide for his family unless he is disable by illness. but if the man is perfectly healthy and able to work, if his wife works it should only be to "help" the husband earning money needed to cover their needs when he does not earn enough money , given that he works a full time job. In Daisy's case, if her husband worked a full time job, and still would not make enough money to cover their family needs, she would probably be able to work few hours less than what she currently is, so she can take care of her kids, and pay for a part time daycare while she works. But I totally think he should be the one out working one or even two jobs, and the wife should stay home with her kids. If it's hard for you to convince your husband to get to work, take him to the doctor, and have his hormones checked up. Some men have some low hormone levels , and that may cause him to feel mentally and physically overwhelmed. If his hormones are fine, then he is just a lazy guy.
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Posted by Courtney
from AZ
One idea is for him to work when you are not working to cut out the idea of daycare costs. If you work weekdays and he works evenings and weekends, you could get the extra money you need to cover the bills without shelling out for babysitters.
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Posted by Kim
from Utah
Both can work and still not have to pay for day care, we did it for years. You get jobs with different shifts and work out the schedules. It is really not hard if you want it to work. It beats not being able to pay the bills.
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